Admit it: You've wanted to do this

A couple of guys in Arizona threw pies at right-winger Ann Coulter while she was speaking at the University of Arizona last Thursday night. Unfortunately, their aim wasn't great and Ms. Coulter didn't get to eat much pie. Nevertheless, because it was Ann Coulter, blond-thin-white mouthpiece for the Republicans, the assailants were arrested and charged with assault, disorderly conduct (misdemeanors), and criminal damage (a class five felony).

Criminal damage? To Ann Coulter's face? No, silly--to a stage backdrop. Estimated damage: $3,000. Because it got a little cream pie on it.

The moral of the story: If you're going to throw a pie at a right-wing political figure, be prepared to be treated as a terrorist.